Preschoolisms

Hide n Seek

Tue, 22 Jan 2013 18:53:52 -0600

Today I wore this big scarf to work (it was -12 when I left the house, not including windchill…) that kept falling forwards onto the kids whenever I leaned over. At one point early in the day when this happened, I made a joke out of it and covered the kid’s head purposely saying, “Where is Simon? There he is!” Later in the afternoon, I was leaning over to look at one of my students coloring, and accidentally covered his face with my scarf. He must have overheard the earlier interaction because he loudly exclaimed,

“Where is me? Where is me, Julianna? HERE I IS!”

I can’t say I blame him, he was totally following the rules of a language that is notorious for breaking them. Cute, nonetheless.

andro-saurus: excuse me. Ms. Frizzle totally would’ve...

Mon, 19 Nov 2012 20:47:16 -0600

andro-saurus:

excuse me.

Ms. Frizzle totally would’ve worn these, and since she is one of my main inspirations….I am lustin’ after these t-rex pumps LIKE WHOA.

"Do birds wear sweaters? What about gooses, do they wear mittens?"

Mon, 19 Nov 2012 20:38:06 -0600

“Do birds wear sweaters? What about gooses, do they wear mittens?””

- (Asked to me by a 3 year old, who was very concerned about birds staying warm in wintertime. I told her I would gladly teach her to knit so we could make them mittens & sweaters).

No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed!

Sat, 06 Oct 2012 09:22:00 -0500

(Story borrowed from my co-worker, while he was sitting with a 2 1/2 year old who bit & pushed another kid)

Teacher: It is not okay to bite our friends, that hurts them.

Kid: (no response, staring off into space)

Teacher: Did you hear what I just said?

Kid: Yes! No more monkeys jumping on the bed!

"A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it"

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 08:21:54 -0500

“A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it”

- Jerry Seinfeld (as quoted in the book “The Happiest Toddler on the Block,” by Harvey Karp.

"19 Surprising Facts About Toddlers"

Sun, 23 Sep 2012 23:28:00 -0500

Came across this Jezebel article today, “19 Surprising Facts About Toddlers” by Tracy Moore. My favorites are pasted below:

1. Did you know that a toddler is just like a person who has never been told anything at all about how the world works, including gravity, feelings or bathroom doors?

4. Did you know that a toddler will eat string cheese four times a day?

7. Did you know that your toddler will jump up and down on the couch even though you said not to a thousand times, and then when you ask the toddler why she is jumping up and down on the couch when you told her not to, she will say, “Because I’m jumping,” like you are the idiot?

Making Mom & Dad (and the cat) Proud

Sun, 16 Sep 2012 00:46:00 -0500

(while sitting on the potty)

2 Year Old: I’m gonna make a BM

Me: Okay! Sounds like a plan.

2 Year Old: I’m gonna make it for Mommy.

Me: Yep, Mommy will be proud of you for using the potty.

2 Year Old: For mommy and daddy.

Me: Yes, Daddy will be proud of you, too!

2 Year Old: And for Murphy.

Me: Uhhh, who is Murphy?

2 Year Old: My cat!

childrenwithswag: Hugo I spend a large part of my day admiring...

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 21:57:20 -0500

childrenwithswag:

Hugo

I spend a large part of my day admiring baby clothes at work while changing the diapers and lunch-splattered clothing of my toddlers. This outfit is pretty awesome.

Less than a week until I start my new job working with...

Thu, 02 Aug 2012 14:23:16 -0500

Less than a week until I start my new job working with toddlers. Wish me luck! I promise some new, if not less verbal, stories will start appearing in the coming weeks.

Is That A Face Tattoo?

Fri, 13 Jul 2012 01:53:20 -0500

An Open Letter to the Bike Repair Guy I Met Today:

No, I do not have large facial tattoos, but thanks for asking and being interested. The giant purple streaks coming down my forehead from underneath my helmet are the result of spending my afternoon with toddlers who ate plums and blueberries, and who then “pet” my face and “decorated” my hair with their berry-stained fingers.

Some people might call this dirty. I call it love.

ohcrackohcrack: nationofamanda: a while back i made my...

Fri, 13 Jul 2012 01:44:26 -0500

ohcrackohcrack:

nationofamanda:

a while back i made my hedgehogs playhouses out of cardboard boxes…a bakery and a record store to be precise. they loved them to death and now i need to make them new ones. so long pretty play houses. you are now smelly and old.

so cute! I used to make very elaborate houses for my rats and they would pee all over them and nibble holes in the walls and tear them up to make nests in the corners, which is totally what rodents do when they’re super into stuff so it was all cool, they were very well-loved little houses..

The school I just started working at has some pet rodents (rats and rabbits, maybe?) in the older classrooms. It would be hilarious to see what storefronts four-year-olds would come up with. My guess? A disproportionate number of fire stations and ice cream shops.

SUMMER! the school year ended last week, and my summer teaching...

Thu, 14 Jun 2012 15:44:18 -0500

SUMMER!

the school year ended last week, and my summer teaching job doesn’t start until next week…which means I’ve had lots of free time to spend drinking coldpress, trying to capture this beautiful moment of milk-meeting-coffee on film (er..camera phone) but never succeeding.

So Long, Farewell!

Thu, 07 Jun 2012 00:28:00 -0500

Yesterday was the last day of the school year! I can’t believe the end has already arrived; time has passed so quickly. But I created some really meaningful relationships with these kids throughout that time, so letting go and saying goodbye was bittersweet. [Don’t worry, the Justin Bieber dance party we had greatly eased the pain.]

A few kids brought me parting gifts - a potted plant, a rose, a gift card for a coffee shop. Others made cards with help from their parents. And this is when it gets weird…one card read,

“Dear Miss J: [child’s name] has had such a wonderful year at [school]. Thank you so much for helping her out! She comes home and talks about you all the time - she even wants you to marry her uncle! Wishing you the best, [parents names]”

How….nice? Another card, also odd but in an infinitely cuter way, said at the end:

“Also…[child] still won’t stop talking about her plan to “adopt” Miss J. She asked if we could adopt you because she is sad that she won’t see you anymore when she goes to kindergarten. I pray that she will keep seeing you at [school]!”

Save the Birds!

Thu, 07 Jun 2012 00:14:00 -0500

Kid: Ummm, guess what? Um my grandma had a bird and it died. Was sad.

Me: Oh no, that is sad. What happened?

Kid: It ate a worm and died.

Me: It died from eating a worm? Was your grandma sad?

Kid: Yes.

Me: Will she get a new bird?

Kid: No, she doesn’t want to waste birds.

Who needs Botox, anyway?

Sat, 02 Jun 2012 07:20:00 -0500

Yesterday at lunch, one of my students asked me how old I was. I replied with my favorite response, “How old do you think I am?”

Kid 1: Ummmm, 9!

(then, the girl sitting next to him chimed in)

Kid 2: No, my sister is 9 and teacher is bigger than her.

Kid 1: 14!

Me: Bigger than 14!

Kid 2: 20?

Me: A little bit bigger, keep going!

Kid 2: 70?

Me: Not that big! I’ll give you a hint: it is a number between 20 and 30.

Kid 1: 90!

Should I be concerned by this, given that my students are four days (and a summer) away from being kindergartners? Just kidding, I am INCREDIBLY proud of the progress that all of them have made. At least half the class is already starting to read, which is basically just AWESOME.

Photo

Wed, 30 May 2012 00:12:10 -0500

Fear Factor: Preschool Edition

Sat, 05 May 2012 15:41:06 -0500

Recently, our school was the recipient of a DoE grant that brings fresh fruit and vegetable snacks to each classroom every day. Lucky us, right? Except that the choices have been less than ideal for the five-year-old palate. Pears, mangos, grapes, apples, carrot sticks, and cucumber slices have gone over well. Raw cauliflower, raw broccoli, raw sweet potato, celery without peanut butter or any other dip, raw green beans, and raw zucchini….not so much. Regardless, we have a class rule that everyone has to try at least one BITE of the snack. It has led to some hilarious moments - kids claiming they are allergic to tomatoes (“My mommy says I can’t have those.”) to dramatically clenching their teeth and telling me they’re being poisoned.

Cauliflower day was particularly entertaining - as it turns out, most of my students had never encountered it before. While munching delicately on a piece of it, one student approached me with a very thoughtful look on her face:

Kid: Did I mention that this tastes like nothing?

Me: You’re right, it really doesn’t have a strong flavor.

Kid: Yes. It’s like a boring cousin of broccoli!

(She then proceeded to spit the rest of her mouthful out in the garbage can…)

Go Wash Your Feet!

Sat, 05 May 2012 15:32:00 -0500

Earlier this week, with temperatures soaring into the 80s (whoa!) I wore sandals to work for the first time this year. I forgot that this would inevitably involve explaining my stick n poke toe tattoos to my students - there was no way this was going to slide past them.

Sure enough, not even 5 minutes into the day, one of my kids points to my toes. “What’s that?”

Before I could muster a response, another student came over to look. Petting my big toe, she said “You drewed on yourself?”

The first student looked shocked. “Does your mommy know? You have to take a bath to get that off later.”

Almost makes me wish I worked with kids old enough to write full...

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 14:27:20 -0500

Almost makes me wish I worked with kids old enough to write full sentences- it’s a whole other world of possibilities…

"A child can always teach an adult three things: To be happy for no reason, To always be busy with..."

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 00:15:22 -0500

“A child can always teach an adult three things:
To be happy for no reason,
To always be busy with something,
And to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires.”

- Paulo Coelho (via nirvikalpa)